Damaged and the Cobra - Chapter One

Chapter One - Lark

Even when my heart was breaking, I smiled. No matter if I was sad, angry, or scared, I had a smile plastered on my face. My older sister Raven called it a coping mechanism. She heard the term on Oprah and it sounded right, but all I knew was I smiled even when inappropriate.

My grandfather once slapped me for smiling. At my little brother’s funeral, he hit me in front of everyone and said it wasn’t the time for my silly smiles. Raven screamed at him and punched his neck because she wasn’t tall enough to reach his face. She even tried climbing on a chair to hit him. By then, people were freaking out. My mother was crying and my grandmother ran off because she was afraid of my grandfather’s temper. The preacher struggled to settle everyone down, but it was no use. The funeral was ruined. Through the chaos and my tears, I kept smiling like I couldn’t stop myself.

There were very few things capable of making me genuinely smile since Raven ditched town six months earlier. Since then, I’d made new friends like Bailey Johansson who was loud and rough like Raven. I had also bonded with the Smith sisters. During Farah’s wedding, I found something really worth smiling over.

His name was Aaron.

While I never went as far as writing his name on my folder in class, I did think about doing it. Ever since I met him at the wedding rehearsal, I was forever wondering about Aaron. The first time he walked into the room and I noticed the cobra tattoo up his neck, I was fascinated. My interest only grew when I saw him smile and his blue eyes lit up in the most beautiful way.

Over and over, I tried to talk to Aaron at the rehearsal dinner. I planned to make another move at the wedding reception, but he brought a date.

Hopes dashed, I returned to my dull life in Ellsberg. My newest friends were living these wild lives with sexy men. Well, not Bailey who couldn’t keep a man past a few hookups. Even with her crappy romantic options, she was miles ahead of me in the exciting life department.

All I did most days was work the morning shift at Denny’s before hurrying to my two afternoon classes at Hampton College. I could only afford two because I was paying my way through college. Despite my irritation at how long it would take me to get a degree, I knew it could be worse.

No one in my family ever finished college or even worked in an office. They were all waitresses or janitors. My mom did marry a rich man with a business, but she had to give up a lot to keep him. I didn’t plan to end up like her.

I wanted an office job and a man who wouldn’t tell me what to eat and how to dress. I wanted to be strong and free. Even if I ended up alone forever, this would be better than being someone’s slave.

My sister refused to be a slave too, yet she had horrible taste in men. So Raven bounced from one loser to the next. Now, she was in California with her latest turd. While I missed Raven more than I could express to her or anyone else, I resented how she left Ellsberg. Most days, I blamed my stepdad Larry. When I was honest, I blamed Raven for leaving me behind.

No longer alone, I had a chance at a new direction in my life. Hopefully this new direction might one day include the gorgeous and artistic Aaron Barnes.

The one downside to my friendships was agreeing to activities I didn’t enjoy. Like bowling.

Bowling had always bored me. Raven and I had been in a league for a while with the girls from our roller derby team. On more than one occasion, I faked an illness to get out of it. I sucked at bowling and didn’t find it the least bit entertaining. Yet, I readily agreed when Farah invited me to join the crew at one of the local alleys.

Tucker Johansson called us the crew now. Everyone was pairing up and he seemed relieved about this fact. Claimed it felt good not to be the only whipped guy around. He made this announcement again while rubbing his girl Maddy’s pregnant belly.

Nearby, Cooper refused to admit he was whipped. However, he looked pretty domesticated with Farah on his lap feeding him nachos. She even wiped his mouth like she was practicing for when they had kids.

Judd and Tawny stumbled in late. With his dark hair tussled and her cheeks flushed, I sensed they stopped on the way for a quickie. Yep, everyone was in a state of bliss except for me. Oh, and Vaughn who was the only one who really liked bowling.

Ignoring all the whispering couples around him, Vaughn taught me to bowl while I faked like I cared. We were both on the outs and I suspected he wanted to find a new buddy now that Judd was attached to his angel. Every time Tawny laughed, Vaughn’s frown darkened.

“You should be happy for them,” I said as he guided me towards the alley.

“I am. Fucking overwhelmed with happiness. Now, pay attention.” When I flinched at his tone, Vaughn sighed. “It gets boring when your best friend is busy mating like a rabbit.”

“My best friend ditched me too, so I found new friends. Maybe you should too.”

“Crap no. Sounds like too much effort.”

I grinned. “You could play with Bailey. Here, she comes.”

Vaughn didn’t even glance at the arriving blonde who threw her hands in the air.

“I got dumped again! Men suck! I hate them all!” she cried, enjoying a hug from Tawny. “Who wants to set me up now?”

“I thought you hated men,” Tucker mumbled with his mouth full of a hot dog.

“I do, but one of them has got to work, right? Everyone in the world gets someone good, but I get shit. It’s not fair. I’m nicer than anyone ever.”

This comment elicited laughter from the crew including Vaughn who took my bowling ball and rolled it for me.

“Look,” he said,” you got a strike. I’m an excellent teacher.”

“Best ever.”

Vaughn and I eyed each other, thinking the same thing. Could we make a go of it and become a couple like everyone around us? We came to the same conclusion. Never going to happen. While I thought Vaughn was gorgeous, I felt the same way about the Johansson brothers and Judd. Besides gorgeous, they didn’t interest me. Only Aaron interested me, but I couldn’t have a single conversation with him.

Vaughn glanced over at a happy Bailey who loved all of the attention and pity she received after getting dumped. He was thinking if he could make something with her. Based on his eye roll, she wasn’t an option either.

Noticing Vaughn’s fresh tattoo on the back of his forearm, I had an idea.

“Where did you get your tat?”

“Aaron’s shop. You want to get a tat?” he asked, grinning as if this was hilarious.

“I have one,” I said, rolling the ball into the gutter. “It’s not finished though.”

“How come?”

“My brother interrupted the tattoo and I never had the money to get it done again.”

“No, I meant how come you’re such a bad bowler? Is it genetic?” he asked. “Like do you come from a long line of people who can’t make a ball roll in a straight line?”

“You’re hilarious.”

“I try, Pixie Dust.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“How come?” he said, grinning wider now.

“I’m not talking to you anymore.”

“Oh, don’t be like that. Chicks love when I give them nicknames. One of them got a tattoo of the name I gave her. Do you want to know where she put that tat?”

Laughing, I shook my head. “Is it expensive to get a tat at Aaron’s shop? I hear he’s good and I’d like someone to fix it that won’t make it worse.”

“Let me see your tat!” Bailey cried, suddenly behind me. “Wait, it’s not on your ass, is it?”

“No.”

“Hooch?”

“No.”

“Titty tas?” Glaring at her, I waited until her smile faded. “Are you really mad?” she asked, panicking now.

“No, I just wanted to mess with you.”

“Oh, well, thank you for that learning experience.”

Vaughn and I laughed, but Bailey was busy yanking at my shirt to look for the tattoo.

“It’s a tramp stamp,” I said to keep her from pulling up my shirt in a public place.

“Oh, I have one of those. Mine is classy though. It’s Hello Kitty.”

Instead of responding to her classy comment, I prepared for the teasing as I lowered the back of my jeans just enough to display my wingless butterfly.

“What a pretty worm,” Bailey said, doing her fake nice thing again.

“My stepbrother showed up and made the guy stop. My stepdad doesn’t like tats and told me I couldn’t get one.”

“Men suck,” Bailey said, nodding supportively then frowning at Vaughn. “Why do you suck so much? Too much ball toxins?”

“Sounds about right,” he muttered, rolling another strike. “Girls get PMS. Guys get ball toxins. Common knowledge. Are you two going to actually bowl? I’m the only one doing anything.”

Farah instantly rushed over and rolled a ball into the gutter. “We’re participating. We like bowling.”

Bailey snorted. “Hell, I lie better than that.”

Cooper joined Farah and glanced at the alley. “I could bowl, if I wanted. I just don’t want to.”

“Liar!” Bailey cried and Cooper faked like he might backhand her. She just rolled her eyes. “He sucks. Worse bowler ever. Old people bowl better. No offense to old people,” she added, looking at the nearby league of senior citizens.

Cooper ignored Bailey and wrapped an arm around Farah. “This is fun. I’m glad we’ve made a habit out of it.”

Vaughn frowned and his blue eyes darkened. “I’m not a charity case, so you don’t need to play with me once a week to keep me from bawling myself to sleep.”

“Sure, champ,” Cooper said then looked at me. “You have a tattoo of a worm?”

“It’s supposed to be a butterfly,” I said as Bailey turned me so her brother could enjoy my lame tat.

Cooper reached for the tat as if to run a finger over it. Before he touched me, Farah smacked his hand lightly.

“Don’t touch other women,” she growled.

Glancing back at them, I saw Cooper get his horny expression. I was apparently in the middle of a game they played. Gross.

“Do you know how much it would cost to get it fixed?” I asked as Cooper ran his finger over Farah’s pouting lips.

Without looking away for his wife’s face, Cooper shook his head. “I’ll pay. Just tell Aaron I said what I said. He’ll be cool.” As if a light bulb went off over his head, Cooper glanced at me. “You should go soon. Very soon. Can’t leave it undone for much longer or it’ll get weird. Yeah, go this week.”

Frowning, I noticed Bailey eyeing her brother. Her blue eyes got wide and she nodded.

“Yes, soon. So soon. Well, maybe not too soon. I don’t want to be alone.” When Tawny appeared next to her, Bailey decided to be nice and said grudgingly. “Soon, I guess.”

“What are we talking about?” Tawny asked as Judd rolled a ball, knocked over a few pins, then frowned like he might knock the others over with his angry glare.

“Aaron’s going to fix her tat,” Bailey explained while Cooper and Farah wandered off.

“He’s an artist,” Tawny cooed. “He made this angel on Judd.”

After Tawny showed me Judd’s arm, she put her hand back to where she had a gorgeous tattoo of a fallen angel.

“He’s very talented,” she added.

“I’m excited to get my butterfly finished.”

“He’ll do a great job,” Bailey reassured, taking a ball from Vaughn and rolling it into the wrong alley. “Oops.”

“Idiot.”

“Be nice or I won’t be nice,” Bailey warned, glaring up at him.

“I love feisty women,” he said, smirking down at her.

“Not interested. Blond men are usually stupid. Just look at my brothers. Anyway, I don’t want a dumbass loser. I want a smartass winner.”

“You deserve nothing less,” I said and Bailey smiled at me like I was amazing.

I did feel amazing. Not only would my tattoo get fixed, but I also had an excuse to talk to Aaron. I didn’t know if Aaron would enjoy the conversation as much as I did, but fate was no longer standing in my way.

 

 

Damaged and the Knight: Chapter One

Different girls have different dreams. My sister Farah wanted to be a teacher and live a safe life with a safe man. She wanted average. My only dream was not to die violently.

When I was ten, a nice lady at the motel we lived at would often give me candy. As I grew older, I suspected the reason Melody's kids didn't live with her was because she was a prostitute and the mean man she lived with was her pimp. Back then, I only knew she had a sweet smile and a pretty laugh. I wanted to laugh pretty like Melody, but my dad said I had a donkey laugh.

As I hid in the motel room years later, I thought back to her sweet smile. When the paramedics took Melody away, her face was a bloody mess and I couldn't even see where her eyes and nose were anymore. A victim of violence at the hands of her boyfriend/pimp, her beautiful face was gone forever. Days later, I heard from the ladies who worked with Melody how she hadn’t made it.

Every night afterwards, I prayed to die quickly like in a car accident. I just didn’t want to die from having my face pounded in.

This fear kept me from leaving the motel room long after I ran out of food. I refused to die at the hands of the strange men messing with the door. Knocking and laughing, they often peeked in the window. They were still playing, but soon their games would end.

I wasn’t a religious type and didn’t grow up learning about God. I just knew some people had darkness inside them. While good people could do bad things, bad people were simply bad and there was no fixing them.

My dad was bad, but he wasn’t obviously evil. He had a handsome face and a really great smile. People loved that smile and so did I. When he smiled, I knew I was safe. When he wasn’t smiling, I worried. Since Farah left for college, I worried a lot.

Now, I waited.

A few times, I imagined climbing out of the window and running away until I found a good person or the police. I pictured escaping, but reality took hold and I imagined what those men next door would do if they caught me. No matter how hungry I became, I feared their hands on me more than starvation.

Leaving through the door wasn’t possible since I’d pushed a dresser against it. Too weak and exhausted to move it now, I waited with a knife in my hand. Whether I used it on them or me, the blade was the way the end would come.

I knew the men next door were bad because only bad people stayed in this motel on the lonely highway. This was why Dad hid us there.

Under a death sentence, Dad had borrowed money from bad guys to pay off other bad guys then stole money from nice people to pay back the first bad guys. Eventually, both the police and bad guys were on his tail.

Those last few days, I learned to hate my dad. Whining about needing Farah back, he left me to die. Sometimes, I imagined using the knife on him if he returned. Kill him and end his pointless life. Not only could I stop him from hurting people, I might finally leave this awful motel.

The knock sounded loud in my head and I prayed my father had returned. As much as I hated him, I needed to leave this place. If he took me anywhere with normal people, I would find my way back to Farah.

Someone was at the window. Though my father was a decently built man, he wouldn’t shadow everything with his size like the man outside. I hid out of view as the man peered through the crack in the curtains.

“Tawny Smith.”

His voice wasn’t loud, but it held an edge. Not angry, yet willing to cause me pain if I didn’t answer. Yet, I remained silent because it was safer to let him come get me. If I hid in the corner and looked as afraid as I felt, he wouldn't think I was a threat. He might get close enough for me to cut him before he hurt me. After I cut him, I would suffer, but that would happen anyway.

“Cooper Johansson sent me.”

Instead of his words, my mind focused on the blade in my hand. After working at the door again, he peeked in the window. I nearly felt his frustration as my mind returned to the name Cooper Johansson.

Cooper loved Farah. She was his girl. He said she was more beautiful the more she showed to him. Cooper was sending someone to bring me to Farah.

Standing, I walked cautiously towards the window. Outside, a dark haired man frowned at me. His blue eyes were beautiful, but cold.

“Tawny Smith,” he said, officially losing his temper.

“Yes.”

“Your sister’s boyfriend sent me. Open the door.”

“My sister?”

“Are you opening the door or do I need to kick the fucking thing in?” he asked then clenched his heavily stubbled jaw before sighing. Finally, he added in a slightly less pissed off voice, “Open the door, Tawny.”

“I can’t. The dresser is against it and it’s too heavy to move now.”

The man stared at me like I was a moron and he was probably right. I wasn’t even strong enough to climb through the window. While I could flop out, I wasn’t willing to face what might be waiting for me. Now, the only threat outside was the gorgeous man frowning at me.

“Can you slide open the window?” he asked softly as if talking to a stupid child.

Nodding, I set aside the blade and used both hands to pull the rusted window open.

With only a screen separating us, he nearly whispered, “Move back.”

Obeying, I grabbed my blade and stood against the wall while he shoved the screen into the room. Instead of awkwardly climbing in with his size, he jumped headfirst, hit the ground, and rolled to his feet like it was nothing. Well, his thick wavy hair was mussed.

When his eyes met mine, we stared at one another. Too handsome to be real, he was somehow flesh and bone mere feet from me. Several inches over six feet, wide shouldered, and tanned, this man made me feel both beautiful and hideous under his gaze.

His earlier irritation gone, he looked at me as if disinterested. For a second though, I saw a glimmer of something hiding behind those cold eyes. Maybe a humanity he didn’t like showing people.

“I’m Judd,” he said finally, glancing around.

“My sister sent you?”

“Cooper wants you in Ellsberg. Pack up so we can leave.”

Studying Judd, I was nervous to leave. Yet, based on his expression, I had no a choice in the matter.

“Your shit,” he said, taking my face in one of his strong rough hands. At first, his gaze focused on the faded bruise across my chin caused by Dad’s belt buckle. Then, he stared into my eyes and asked, “Are you on drugs?”

“Drugs make people stupid and I’m dumb enough already,” I said, reciting the words my father often told me. “Do you know my sister?”

Walking to the window, Judd pulled out his phone. As he spoke with someone, I accepted this was real and I would be free if I did what he said. Rushing to the bathroom where my dirty clothes were folded neatly in a duffle bag, I grabbed my stuff before returning to Judd who was still on the phone.

“She’s fucked up or something, man,” Judd said quietly. After a minute, he sighed. “I’ll get her out of here and feed her. Once she seems less out of it, I’ll have her call her sister.” After a moment of silence, he glanced at me over his shoulder. “Cooper, I’ll call you when we’re on the road.”

Hanging up, he shoved the phone into the pocket of his dark leather jacket. “You packed?”

“You’ll take me to my sister.”

Hearing the lack of a question in my words, Judd merely shoved the dresser aside and gestured for me to follow him. I walked to the doorway and stared out at the bright day. Even after spending the last week convinced I would die in the motel, I was afraid to leave.

Stopping at a black Suburban, Judd frowned like he was ready to yell at me. He had the same look on his face as my dad when the belt was coming off. Judd didn’t yell though. He only walked to where I stood, grabbed my wrist, and tugged me into the parking lot. Opening the passenger door, he cursed.

“Where are your shoes?”

When I didn’t answer, Judd stalked back into the room to find them. I stood next to the SUV and waited for him to return. Instead of Judd’s voice, I heard the man who had taunted me for weeks.

“Look who is out and ready to play.”

Tommy had small rat eyes and long stringy hair he hid under an old cap. Even looking homeless, he was in charge of the other men and I’d watched him intimidate the manager. Whatever Tommy did to gain his power, he wanted only the one thing from me. Based on his smile, he thought this was his lucky day.

“Pretty, pretty,” Tommy murmured, rubbing at his long goatee while his three friends grinned nearby. “Is Daddy around?”

Pressing myself against the SUV, I didn’t answer him as I held the blade behind me. I was so tired and my stomach felt hollowed out. All I wanted was to see Farah who offered salvation.

“Fuck off,” Judd said, shoving Tommy out of his way. Opening the SUV door wider, he tossed my shoes and bag inside. “Get in the car.”

Walking past Judd to climb into the SUV, I whispered, “They’re going to hurt you.”

Judd’s handsome face was hard like a statue and he didn’t seem to hear me before shutting the door. Walking around the SUV, he never acknowledged the men.

Tommy continued to leer at me like he often did through the curtains while promising to make me squeal. I didn’t think he would give up his prize with just one guy standing in his way.

Even moving fast, Tommy never stood a chance. Judd effortlessly grabbed the freak and slammed his head against the SUV hood. The first impact shattered Tommy’s nose while the second strike splashed blood across the windshield. Tossing him to the ground, Judd yanked out a gun and used its butt to bash Tommy across the head.

When Tommy’s friends moved to help him, Judd pointed the gun at them. “Fuck off.”

“You don’t know who you’re messing with,” said one of the guys.

“I know enough to be sure if I blew this fucker’s head off, you’d dump him in a ditch somewhere instead of calling the cops. Now, either I’m dropping all four of you or I let you walk away. How loyal are you fucks?”

Apparently not very loyal, they backed away quickly. Judd held Tommy by the back of his jacket and hit him again and again until the freak who terrorized me for weeks hung limply. Dropping him on the ground, Judd stomped hard on Tommy’s groin. Finally, he wiped the bloody gun handle on Tommy’s jeans before returning the weapon to his jacket.

Walking leisurely around the SUV, Judd joined me inside. He said nothing while using the wipers to remove the blood from the windshield. Despite the violence, Judd looked bored. Hell, he wasn't even winded.

As we pulled away from the motel, I couldn’t take my eyes off Judd. He was both my handsome knight in shining armor and the scariest motherfucker I’d ever seen.